1 Peter 3:7 says “… dwell with them with understanding, giving honor to the wife, as to the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together of the grace of life …”
What did Peter have in mind when he wrote this verse?
Peter could have been basing this call to the then prevailing un-proportionate vulnerabilities that women and wives faced that were real. Women used to suffer from economically, legally, spiritual, social and politically injustices. They had no rights and were seriously trodden upon – a situation that made them appear weaker, helpless and easily exploitable. Women were not strong enough to fight back.
Does weaker mean? Lesser, inferior, substandard?
Imagine being asked to walk around in a dark room full of men and women, blind-folded, to separate females from males by touch. You would definitely use your instinct of what is soft and what is hard to separate the sexes. Now, imaging 10 women fighting 10 men of say the same age – who would emerge weaker? Imagine a football match – men against women. Wow!
Female vessels have a way of being typically, irrefutably and relatively softer and more tender (weak) than those of their male counterparts. This softness expresses itself in what we see as weakness, though in reality it is not.
I believe that God in His omniscience created women softer intentionally for three reasons.
First, in His sovereignty, God chose to express Himself through women this way, period! He expresses Himself through masculinity and femininity!
Secondly, He wanted beauty that would make women irresistible to men. Men are attracted to this feminine softness. Opposites attract. This attraction leads to falling in love, marriages, families and procreation.
Thirdly, God created women as soft He designed a typical woman to be a nurturer. (I will expound on what nurturing is and is not in another blog). Nurturing is a noble calling that requires this kind of softness. On the other hand, men are designed to be protectors and warriors, thus the typical roughness and complex muscular network and skeleton.
Femininity also comes with a womb, anatomical features and related undeniable vulnerabilities like painful interruptive monthly, sometimes painful menstruation periods. This comes what is viewed as weakness. Then pregnancies, painful birth processes, caring for delicate infants etc. These vulnerabilities need to be admitted and treated with the delicacy that they deserved.
Another related picture that comes to mind is that of a cotton material compared to a silk one. Silk is softer and tenderer than cotton, but it is more valuable and more preferred in terms of class. It therefore requires more care, admiration and honor.
I am sure what Peter meant by weaker has to do with soft and delicate. Sometimes, in many ways, soft is stronger than hard! Soft can conquer strong intellectually and/or in terms of wisdom, counsel even in terms of leadership skills. Like Paul says in his letter to the Corinthians, sometimes God uses what is considered weaker in this world to confound the stronger (1Cor. 1:27).
I am aware that this softness has in many ways been abused and degraded by the fallen world and its people. No wonder many women do not want to hear that they are weaker vessels but many more have resigned to this fact and are living apathetic lives.
There is definitely need for us to redeem femininity, not by denying facts; not by revolting against God’s created order; trying to build muscles or to be like men or expressing bitterness, anger and violence, but by advocating for womanhood, honor and respect that Peter recommends. Women are extremely strong and in many ways they are stronger than me. This should be exploited diligently, without being diverted by misunderstood and misquoted fact!
Feminine ‘weakness’ needs to be valued, cherished and honored. Let us embrace the fact that women are ‘weaker’ vessels in ways expounded above and go ahead to celebrate feminine strengths, ensuring that women are accorded the honor due to their womanhood in all spheres of society!
